what the fuck are sea legs, and why don't i have a pair yet?

I have never seen so many pissed off girls crowded around a big bin of confiscated hair straighteners before in my life… apparently, port security seizes all dryers and straighteners that are not auto-shut-off (I’m not really sure how one would go about confirming that, though) before you’re allowed to board a ship; who knew.

Fun facts that I’ve learned on my first day on the M.V. Explorer:
- 7,000 condoms were handed out during the last voyage
- Every person that’s from a school in California goes to a “San” something, and you will never be able to differentiate any of them
- Knowing the difference between port and starboard doesn’t even kind of matter when you can’t make it to either side to puke your brains out (but thankfully, this isn’t firsthand experience)
- Granola tastes way better going down, compared to going up (quite unfortunately, this is firsthand)
- Running on a treadmill, on a boat, in the middle of a storm is quite possibly the worst idea in the history of mankind
- Meeting 700 new names and faces means that reintroducing yourself to the same person three times makes you look like a jackass (but you can’t very well say that the reason for this is because they have very undistinguishing features)
Classes start Thursday; this is most certainly not a cruise.